You will be happy to know that your fears are for nothing. The reason men become so much larger to women after weight training has minimal to do with the training itself, but is mostly hormonal. You see, men have a lot more testosterone floating around their bodies then women do. Testosterone is the hormone responsible for the physical distinctions between men and women in regards to muscle size and strength. No matter how much or how hard a woman trains, she will not turn into a muscle bound male impersonator. There are some women who do seem to represent your fear, but it more then likely would be caused by the way they 'supplement' their training, if you know what I mean. The average women who is training for shape and tone has nothing to worry about.

Hey, do you want to know the fastest way to achieve a lean, toned physique - train like a guy! Common gym mentality instructs men to train with high weights, low reps to build muscle and women to train with low weight and high reps to 'shape' the muscle. You know why that is instructed - ignorance. Its the same 'old school' mentality that has been around for years, back when women only occupied the aerobic room. Weight training is basically a stimulus for your body to change, so with a bigger stimulus there is more chance of change. Weight training will NOT make you big.